For many people there is a time of the year that is more difficult than others. A certain week or month comes by and brings with it an extra measure of sorrow and reminiscing. It’s an anniversary of grief, a remembrance of the time when someone dear was lost. My anniversary of grief comes in the first week of January.
My sweet Gramma Sharon exited this world and entered Heaven about eight years ago. My family and I were very close with her, as she lived with us for my entire life. She is a precious soul, generous to a fault, always aware of the people around her and their needs, and she believed her calling in life was to hug people. Many people didn’t even know her name, they just called her, “The Huggy Lady.”
As this eighth anniversary of seeing her suffering come to an end drifts closer, I find myself reflecting on the first year of grieving her loss. No matter how prepared you are with knowledge of Heaven and faith in God and memorized Scriptures, you will still endure a crushing weight of sorrow when you lose someone dear. It was the same for me. I was still grateful for the memorized Scriptures in my heart, as the Holy Spirit would bring them to mind whenever my heart felt squeezed.
As the year went on, I reflected on her legacy in my life. She taught me how to love the people around me with practicality, with physical action. When I started up a new Scripture memorization project of the book of 1 John, it became a positive way for me to work out my grief. So many of the verses sound just like her and the way she lived her life.
With the continued repetition of memorization came the opportunity to pray through her legacy. Oh, that I would live like she did when she would “not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.” (1 John 3:18). If she ever heard a whisper about someone in need, she would show up on their doorstep with bags of groceries. She had a system. The person might be protesting the gift, so Gramma would talk with them and keep them distracted while her children unloaded the car into the house. They were trained not to stop for anything but keep unloading each bag of generous love, all of which had come from the raiding of their own family’s pantry. Gramma was not rich, but she never hesitated to give. All her days she continued to lay down her own life, her own desires and needs, to meet the needs of others, just like the example that Christ gives. “By this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. But whoever has this world’s goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in Him?” (1 John 3:16-17).
I found so much healing and resolution in the journey of memorizing 1 John. And now, all these years later, those words are still with me. The Holy Spirit is still teaching me with them. Because they were connected to my journey of grief when I first memorized them, it’s as if her legacy is tied to them and He is still teaching me through the example of her life whenever I recite them. It has been a precious way to remember her as each anniversary of grief goes by.
Perhaps you find yourself in a journey of new grief or facing an anniversary that makes a loved one seem so far away. I am sorry for your loss and pray that God would give you a special comfort during this time. I also encourage you to set aside a new Scripture memory project as a healthy way to grieve. This dedication to a passage will help you process things before the Lord and the words will continue to be used by the Holy Spirit in all the years to come. It can be a simple Psalm or a whole book, what’s important is giving yourself an opportunity to speak the truth of God in your heart.
May God bless you, may He guide you, may He redeem this time of sorrows and draw you closer to Himself.
Rachel Eernisse, Scripture Speaker
P.S. If you would like to share in the legacy of “The Huggy Lady” with me, you can get a copy of my children’s picture book that is written in her memory. I wrote this during the second year of grief. After taking time to internalize her legacy, I wanted to share it with others. https://www.amazon.com/Huggy-Lady-Rachel-Eernisse/dp/B0BMZ9WJJ1/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2HR2IRIVWK6KA&keywords=the+huggy+lady&qid=1672168608&sprefix=the+huggy+lady%2Caps%2C292&sr=8-1